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Stories are either written in a desperate attempt to remain relevant (see the story in which he spread “Rapping,” the cool new trend for teens to all of Riverdale High) or with punchlines that commonly revolve around gaggles of women mooning over Archie. Maybe I’ve been absorbing too much of the background noise from the new Archie Comics multimedia empire of the last few years, but this Archie is, well, lame. I found an Archie who is not exactly who I remembered. I slipped a copy of “Archie Jumbo Comics #296” into my bag and cracked it open between classes. “Archie Digests” sits right there, behind the register with the rest, and this week, I was the one excited to see it. Oftentimes, when I’m standing in line at a Publix, I wonder who reads soap opera recaps or who is excited to see the latest “Sudoku Recipes for Cat Owners” specialty publication.
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And in my time, I’ve read quite a few “Archie Digests” off the supermarket rack. I’ve read through paperback collections of “Beetle Bailey,” “Charlie Brown” and “Hagar the Horrible.” I devoured Dave Berg and Don Martin strips collected into poorly-bound digest-size “Mad Magazine” paperbacks that I found haphazardly tossed in the stacks at used bookstores.
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I was the kind of kid who read whatever comic book I could get my hands on.
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